Homesick again (naturally)

With Apologies to Gilbert O'Sullivan.

Every so often I get terribly homesick. It's been 10 years since the last time I was with my friends in Chile  and I’m starting to really miss them.  It’s cyclic and this time it’s compounded by being terribly home sick of California as well.... crap, has it only been 4 months since I left?

Going back to Chile in 2011 is out of the question and 2012 has a possibility of doing Ironman 70.3 Pucón but it would mean sidestepping a lot of the responsibilities that I have when/if I go back.

But I want to do Pucón so bad...  I want to go back, share with my friends but also share with my triathlon friends that I manage to convince to go back with me. That’d be the perfect cap to my Ironman season. I’d be more than ready training wise (shit the race would be about 90 days after Arizona after all)

Yet when I mentioned to mom (like I do with all my crazy ideas) she brought up the obligations that I’d have if I go back. I have to visit my aunts and I have to visit my dad’s grave.

Thing is I don’t want to do either of them.

As much as I love my aunts the memories are too painful. All my uncles and the only cousin I really cared about are dead and gone. My aunts are pushing 80 or even 90.... It all just brings a lot of painful memories that I don’t want to deal with.