There are moments when you realize that things happen for a reason. I still don't fully understand the reason why I had to break the leg and drop out of the Georgia Ironteam but it happened and (still) being bitter about it doesn't help anyone, least of all me.
I've analyzed elsewhere why I was so upset with this whole clusterfuck. It boils down to having an unmet challenge. I signed up with the Ironteam after a lot of soul searching regarding the limits I was pushing against. When I decided that I was moving forward with training it became the only balancing factor in a chaotic situation (which eventually ended with them firing me and me moving back to California).
Besides, the leg is starting to feel like its old self again. For the first time since I broke it I was able to swim without pain. You may say that's not that big a deal to begin with and normally I would agree with you but this is the first time where pain is not a factor on my swimming and that counts for a lot when at least the first 30 minutes to an hour of a race are spent swimming 🙂
It also makes the Ironteam a slightly less crazy idea.
It is also validation of the new treatment I started this week. Man, the folks at Team Clinic are unreal. Ever since day 1 I have been able to see and feel a difference. Now 3 hours seems like a real possibility as long as I get my ass in gear and start training as hard as I feel I should.
I've also started to realize that the big TNT family is a celebration.
It is a celebration of those who are no longer with us like Jim Delaney.
It is a celebration of those who continue to fight cancer like Carol Presley and Don Flemming.
It is a celebration of the wins we get against cancer. Paul Gordiejew, husband of a college friend, had his PET scans a year after treatment and according to Amy "This man does not have Lymphoma". Eric and Francisca who are both in remission and who, I hope, stay there until they pass on from natural causes. Karen Landon who is still cancer free (and who I hope will stay that way for years and decades to come)
I'm also starting to accept the fact that I'm getting old. I got around to scanning pictures from an old, old, old birthday (either 30 or 32 years ago!)
Now I can tell my friends' kids that yes, there was Mampato when their parents and I were their age.
But it's not just that. It is starting to really live the phrase live your life without regrets and accepting that whatever happens don't let it rule your life. For me it's harder than it sounds
Ever since I moved to the US I've had a very conflicted relationship with Father's day almost as conflicted as I had with my dad before he passed away.